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when the conditions are right…

~ steve.ridgley ~ Leave a comment

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Flowers are amazing.

As Spring approaches and the first flowers of the season are out, it’s hard not to wonder at their sophistication.

They reach up and face the sun in an attempt to maximise their potential. They become open, literally, to possibilities. When night draws in and growth is no longer fed by the nourishing sunlight, they close and bow their heads, patiently waiting for the next surge of life expanding light and warmth.

They are hugely diverse, bright, colourful in a range of sizes. All are welcome in the garden.

We could learn so much.

 

two ‘i’s in me?

~ steve.ridgley ~ Leave a comment

twoismeandyou

Someone today said to me, “I tell myself I should…”

I’m always curious when I hear language like this…

Sentences like “I think I am…” or “I sometimes ask myself…”

In sentences like this we are implying two parts of ‘self’.
They beg the question, “Which I?” or “Who is speaking to whom?”

Not some weird illness generally, but rather a useful indication of some separation within us, often manifesting in an internal dialogue. Integrating these parts, or at least raising awareness of the value arising from their distinction might be useful?

 

 

internal finger tips

~ steve.ridgley ~ Leave a comment

finger tips

I can feel the steering wheel in my hands. The gloves on my fingers. My skin when I scratch an itch. I can feel my hair through my fingers. My feet on the ground. Sand between my toes. Rain on my face. Sunshine. I can feel my thighs on the chair seat. My arms when they’re folded. I can feel the bag on my shoulder. My knee when it aches. I can even describe the feeling when my toes are so cold I can’t feel them. I can hold something in my hands, blindfold, and probably tell what it is. Its size, shape, texture, hardness, weight…

We are used to feeling. On the outside.

But feelings on the inside are harder. We have less language. Less awareness. Less dexterity in our explanation.

We say things like I’m nervous or I feel good, I feel sick in my stomach or I’m just not feeling too well. I’m happy or I’m anxious or upset. Describing where in our bodies we feel that, and precisely what the sensation is; how the feeling is moving, its temperature, its intensity. This seems harder.

Strange that what our own bodies tell us is more elusive to us than our contact with the external world?

image by: Andreas Roseneder

proceed with caution

~ steve.ridgley ~ Leave a comment

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Flashing amber lights are a familiar sign of the need to proceed with caution.

On the roads at junctions, near schools, at points for pedestrians to cross, in roadworks. On the back or top of vehicles, as warnings or indications of intended direction. At building sites, airports, stations.

What a shame we don’t have them at the junctions and intersections between human beings. Alerts to slow down, stop, be wary, proceed with caution.

 

the nature of connecting

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I was trying to explain to a colleague the other day how I see patterns and connections in things.

“For me, everything is connected to everything else…” I said.

Of course, on reflection that’s probably not true. Kumquats are unlikely to be connected to my retirement. The price of aluminium not really connected to the music on my favourite playlist.

What is true though, is that I do see patterns and connections in things which aren’t obvious to other people. They are however obvious to me. That’s not a statement suggesting that others are missing something, or somehow not as able, or that I’m ‘right’. It just is. I can’t always explain the connection, or why it is significant to acknowledge the connection, but they are often both real and meaningful, to me at least.

What is also true, is that I find it hard to do a mind map – for me, things need to be on more than one ‘branch’, some branches need to be joined up. It isn’t therefore a means to clarifying data, as it is for some, rather a way to create complication and frustration.

I have in the past noticed different people connect things in a variety of ways. I recall running numerous workshops over the years, where delegates, asked to group or theme brainstormed post-it notes, would often group them together if they had, for example, the word ‘training’ on them. To me, this ‘connecting’, whilst valid, missed out on the meaning beneath the words.

It seems we all make connections, make meaning, in different ways.  Maybe you make connections in one of these ways?

These things are about the same subject, so they must be connected?
These things are related through cause and effect?
These things are all connected to a specific outcome?
These things form part of the narrative, the story?
These things have a similar significance?
These things together open up possibilities?

Where we find meaning and connection, because we all do it differently, sometimes leads to misunderstanding, disagreement, confusion. So worth exploring the methods you consciously and unconsciously apply?

 

I should, I should, I should…

~ steve.ridgley ~ Leave a comment

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Your ego is a false identity that your mind created
and then you took up residence in

The “I shoulds” and “I musts” we tell ourselves belong to our ego. It’s not all you are. In fact it’s an illusion, albeit a very influential one.

Be more than your ego. Listen to your soul. Fly free.

personal space

~ steve.ridgley ~ Leave a comment

personal_space

Yesterday I walked up a busy Edgware Road.  I was walking quickly to get a train from Paddington and the pavement was thronging with commuters, shoppers and locals frequenting the many Lebanese eateries.

In front of me was a lady carrying a heavy shopping bag on her left arm.  The arm was hooked double to support the seemingly weighty contents.  Her right arm was projected out, away from her body at 45 degrees, presumably as a counter balance.  The counter balancing arm was obstructing my path and frustratingly making it difficult for me to slip by.

After a few seconds, I stepped out into a space to overtake and nearly went head over heels as a fellow pedestrian walking in the opposite direction was tugging a wheelie case that had escaped my attention.

I suddenly became aware of our personal space.  My space and that of those around me. The space we each occupy, not only with our physical bodies, but also with our chattels, our possessions, our accoutrements.

I wonder how often we notice when we invade others space, or when we cause them to divert?

This wondering returned twenty minutes later when a commuter on my train whacked my shoulder with a laptop case thrown over their shoulder.  But was I leaning into the aisle? Was I invading their thoroughfare, or were they invading my space in my seat?

And now I notice I have described it as my space and their space and introduced the idea of ‘invading’… strong words.

Personal space clearly matters.