free the dancing star in your life

You need chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star

Friedrich Nietzsche

There are many interpretations for this quote. My meaning I take to be…

Only with a freedom in your heart, a freedom to be yourself, to discover and embrace your existence, with all the chaos and complexity that might bring, only then can you bring your dancing star to the surface. A free, expressive version of your ‘self’ that brings light and wonder to the world.

 

giving it out and bringing it back

rapport

We all get on with some people more than others. Sometimes we just click immediately. Sometimes the connection develops over a period of time. But what is rapport?

But when we have a rapportful relationship we know it. We are drawn to it.  We enjoy experiencing it.

Its origins as a word seem to be French – rapporter – to bring back, or return, and a definition might be…

a state of harmonious relationship in which the people or groups concerned understand each other’s feelings or ideas and communicate well

So maybe rapport is simply about giving and receiving? Giving some of ourselves; our ideas, thoughts, emotions and being open to others’ ideas thoughts and emotions in return. Where these connect or overlap, we have rapport.

Sounds easy.

Of course we have to know enough about ourselves, and be open-hearted and generous enough, to be able to authentically share what our feelings, thoughts and ideas are . And we have to be present enough and care enough to hear what is reciprocated.

Maybe that’s why it isn’t always so easy?

 

standing in the crowd

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I’m fascinated by the resurgence of ripped jeans. Clearly on trend, they are everywhere. But let’s just pause for a moment. Who decided to sell us ripped clothes and when did we decide to buy them? It’s not just jeans, Converse sell scuffed up shoes, so that from new, you can have the worn out look. Some designer sneakers are available for $400 with a designer somewhere making hand made tears and marks on your particular shoes.

What next, cars which have scratches in the paintwork? Umbrellas with broken spokes? If the marketeers can persuade us, yes.

If it’s labelled fashion, it seems anything goes. But what does fashion mean?

At the high end it seems to be about breaking new ground. But for the masses, it seems to be about fitting in. About compliance. About peer pressure. Not new; ladies of the Victorian era had their wastes pinched so tight they could barely breathe, in the name of fashion.

Why do we find it so hard to buck the trend? To be individual? To do what we choose?

Or are we in fact doing what we choose?

Choosing to be the same? To fit in? To comply? To seek acceptance? To avoid judgement because others are doing the same? To hide in the crowd?

 

passion

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I read something today, where someone listed what they are passionate about.

It seemed a useful exercise, so I thought I’d try it…

I’m passionate about human beings being the best they can be, Wycombe Wanderers football club, chocolate in the evening, freedom to choose, Strictly Come Dancing, doing the right thing, stationery, just being in the moment, the sound of running water, coaching, being authentically me, Pink Floyd, honest conversations, being there for someone, the film Pretty Woman, sharing, systemic constellations, the musical Les Miserables, being heard, steak and kidney pie with chips, social justice, storms, avoiding ego driven politics, RSA animates videos on YouTube, treating people as adults, driving, nice shoes, learning, respecting people’s difference and right to be, coconut ice cream, clothes with bold colours, being curious…

How about you?