Sometimes we lose sight of ourselves. Our talent. Our beauty. Our ability. Our heart.
If you lose sight of yourself, listen to those who love you. They can see.
self
power on, power off
are you collecting?
You probably have a loyalty card, or six. Maybe you collect points from buying petrol, from visiting your supermarket, from buying coffee, from a number of high street stores? These days we aren’t loyal to one retailer, but the retailers still strive to buy our loyalty. Actually they are spending to protect themselves from our disloyalty. It’s a game. They offer points for us to save for gifts or for money off future purchases, and we dutifully collect the points. Theirs, and often their competitors too.
It seems we like to think we are getting something for nothing. It seems we like to save and to reward our saving endeavours.
So… what if you were rewarded for being loyal to who you are?
What if you had your own loyalty points system? Gaining rewards, gifts and bonuses from living your life in a manner congruent with your sense of self?
Every time you act in a way aligned with your values and beliefs, you gain satisfaction points. Every time you behave or act in line with the things that give you meaning, your account is topped up with a sense of purpose and fulfilment. Every time you do something that makes you happy, you get a bonus injection of joy. Every moment of enhanced self awareness gets you a small gift of learning.
Be loyal to yourself.
No card required.
No account needed.
No password to remember.
Meaningful, priceless, lasting gifts.
karaoke you
Singing someone else’s song is fun… but it’s not your song.
In life, when you stand up to the microphone…
Sing your own song.
Find your own words.
Hum your own tune.
Strum your own beat.
Make your own rhythm.
Voice your own story.
Connect with the hearts, minds and emotions of others through your own lyrics.
Don’t sing a karaoke version of someone else’s life.
Sing yours.
be you
Why are you trying so hard to fit in
when you were born to stand out?various
the glow of humanity
Travelling through any urban area at this time of year and you will see light leakage. The glow of illumination. Street lights, office lights, car headlights, security lights, early evening lounge lights, Christmas lights…
Humanity’s presence reflected in the surrounding environs.
Unintentionally. Light just creates a halo. It spreads like a smokey haze. Leeching into the space around the light source. Unselfishly sharing its light.
We do that with our own light too. Our personal light of presence, of compassion, of capability, of friendship, of appreciation, of recognition, of love.
If we light it up in ourselves, the effect is seen in those around us.
Give it a go. Shine on someone and watch them glow.
map your meaning
When did you last experience working well with others, maybe with a sense of unity, even if you were quite different? Think of a time.
In that moment, what did you do that helped others? How were you of service to them?
What did you do that uniquely served you? That allowed you to do your best and express your potential?
How was your balance of doing for self and for others? In balance? Or skewed, maybe as you would want it skewed, or maybe not?
And in that moment, at that time during that experience, what did you realise about yourself that felt important? What part of that experience developed your inner self, such that you might be more you?
How was your balance here between developing and being more you, with that sense of connection and unity from being with others? In other words, how was your balance of being? Were you being more in service of them or of yourself?
Your orientation to being or to doing, balanced with your orientation towards self or to others is interesting.
Does meaning come in one of those quadrants more easily – being (developing inner) self, being (unity) with others, doing (service) to others and doing for self (expressing your potential)?
If so, are there other quadrants which feel less developed? What would you like to pay more attention to?
Mapping where we find meaning can be illuminating.
share this, it needs to be heard…
I posted on here a while back that we all want to be seen and heard.
Truly seen and heard.
So, if someone was there for you, what would you say?
If you could be heard, what would you say?
What is your truth?
What is your story?
What hasn’t been said?
What needs to be heard?
How did your story come to be?
Where does your story begin?
Where are you now in your story?
How does your story end?
What does your story say about you?
People are listening, you just need to speak your story.
what would your big toe say?
A friend of mine once declared that to be a favourite coaching question of theirs. “What would your big toe say?”
I can’t vouch for its effectiveness as a question. Or its appropriateness.
I do like it though.
The notion of paying attention to a physical part of you fascinates me.
On occasion, when I have found it difficult to get to sleep, I focus my attention on my foot. It works. Maybe it is the sheer mundaneness of directing all my conscious attention to my foot that helps me nod off? Boring the conscious mind into submission perhaps? I pay total attention to my foot’s position. The toes, ankle, sole. To its boundaries; where it begins and ends. To any sensations I have in it, such as a slight tickle, or the feel of the sheet.
I guess my ear would do just as well, but I haven’t learned to build such a close relationship with my ear yet. Or my nose, which I suspect has its attention focused on breathing; and I am very grateful to it for that. Whereas my foot and I are on good terms. We have an understanding.
I think this is why I like the question “What would your big toe say?”
Not, you understand, because it’s a part of the foot. Rather, because it’s a part of you. A part of me. A body part playing an unfamiliar role.
Sometimes we over value the brain. We consult it constantly. We pay it too much respect arguably. Sure, it has its uses. A bit like my nose and breathing, I wouldn’t want to be without my brain. But sometimes I wonder what the rest of me thinks? What do other parts of me feel about this?
Sometimes I listen to my gut or to my heart, why not my big toe?
Try it. Next time you want another perspective, or you’re stuck, or you just want a less busy response from yourself, ask…
“What would my big toe say about this?”
And if that doesn’t work… start a conversation with your elbow.
just what is unacceptable?
Spitting shells of nuts out on a packed train?
Breaking wind in a lift?
Stealing food so you can eat?
Wishing ill of someone?
Swearing in a public place?
Eating with your mouth open?
Undertaking on a motorway?
Borrowing a book and not returning it?
Sex in a public place?
Judging someone’s dress sense?
Judging someone’s accent?
Drinking too much?
Dressing your dog in clothes?
Not being able to spell?
Wearing double denim?
Getting into debt?
Certain tattoos?
Not sharing a gift of chocolates?
Talking about someone behind their back?
Not visiting your old, lonely relative?
Speeding?
Wearing the same socks twice?
Claiming expenses you aren’t owed?
Not washing your hands in the bathroom?
Rude fruit and vegetables?
Cleaning your ear and then eating the wax?
Not sending Christmas cards?
Not showering in the morning?
Taking the last malteser?
Not letting the wine breathe?
Not looking both ways before crossing the road?
Thinking you’re better than someone?
Wishing you had a better life?
Blaming others that you don’t?
Accepting your lot?
Not knowing who you are?
Not caring?
Giving up?
Judging the woman spitting shells of nuts out on a packed train?
illuminated dandelion 